Selling the family home emotions

“Home is where the heart is,” as the saying goes. 

And selling a beloved home can feel like you’re giving up years of memories and a neighbourhood of friendships.

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If the sale involves a significant life change, each twist in the process can feel like salt in the wound.

My partner and I put up our house on the market two weeks ago, expecting it to take at least a few months if it sold at all.

We were surprised just a week later when we received an offer that we accepted.

But, I feel sad about the fact that we are letting go of our 7-year-old home. It’s not a very good feeling. 

As our settlement day was approaching we were feeling churn in our tummies. We are upsizing, going to a better suburb, bigger house , bigger backyard etc but yet we will miss this beloved home of 7 years.

Selling the family home can be a bittersweet experience fraught with mixed feelings. It’s natural to feel nostalgic and sentimental about your childhood memories, as well as anxious and uncertain about the future.

It is critical to allow yourself to feel these emotions and to properly say goodbye to your home.

However, keep in mind that selling the family home is often a necessary and practical decision, and that it can open up new opportunities and adventures.

It’s normal to experience a range of emotions as you go through this process, and it can be beneficial to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist if necessary.

Also Read: Why people regret selling house- Sellers remorse Explained and Tips to Avoid them.

The emotional impact of selling your home

If you’re upgrading to a larger home, relocating closer to family, or accepting a promising new job, selling your home can be bittersweet — you’re moving on to something better while losing a beloved space. 

In other cases, if you are grieving a major life change or downsizing, the home selling process can be distressing.

Then there’s the possibility that you’ve become emotionally attached to your home as a result of all the time and effort you’ve put into improvements. 

Perhaps your home is an extension of who you are, and selling feels like giving up a piece of your self-identity.

In other cases, financial difficulties may make downsizing feel like a failure, making it difficult to let go and agree to a deal.

The longer you’ve lived in the house and the more memories you’ve made there, the more difficult it will be to let go.

So we thought we’d look at a few strategies for selling your home without allowing emotional factors to get in the way. We understand that it is easier said than done. 

However, with a little assistance, careful planning, and forethought, it is possible.

Let’s take a look at how can you deal with this emotional turmoil.

What the 10 mind-blowing Tips to deal with Selling the family home emotions

1.Ask yourself if you’re absolutely ready to sell.

Ask yourself if you’re absolutely ready to sell.

If you’re having second thoughts about selling your home, talk it over with your family to make sure it’s something you truly want to do.

A group discussion, if nothing else, can help everyone air their feelings and allow you to work through the process as a family. 

However, if you’re selling your home to relocate for a major life event such as a new job, a better school, or to be closer to family, the goal here is to allay everyone’s fears and ensure that everyone is on the same page.

2.Price your house Appropriately

Correctly price your home. If you’re feeling a little emotional and aren’t sure if you want to move, it’s human nature to overprice your home.

You probably have an inflated idea of what the house is worth because you love it so much, but that doesn’t mean potential buyers will feel the same way. 

To avoid this scenario, research the value of your home online and consult with a REALTOR who is familiar with pricing in the area.

Many times, if a home isn’t selling, it’s because it was overpriced.

3.Accept & feel the emotions Openly

Accept your emotions. Recognize that your emotions will fluctuate throughout the process. 

A buyer backing out or an appraisal causing a stumbling block isn’t personal; it’s a result of the process.

Hopefully, this will assist you in approaching any problems calmly and thoughtfully.

4.Determine your personal weak points.

 Knowing what is important to you in the home selling process will allow you to work to avoid these factors influencing your decision.

For example, you may have a mental picture of the type of family who will be moving into your home.

This may bias you towards accepting an offer from someone you believe will make the best use of your home, even if others offer more money, and you don’t know what they’ll do once they have the keys.

Be aware of these emotions and how they may influence your decision to accept or decline an offer.

5.Be Patient with all the selling process.

Please be patient. Traditional methods of selling a home can take weeks, months, or even years. 

Even if you have a contract in place, things like appraisals and mortgage lending can cause delays. 

It is common for emotions such as frustration and worry to surface during the journey, especially if it is long.

“Expect everything to take two to three times as long as they say,” Ryan says.

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6.Work with your emotions, rather than against them

While the home selling experience itself can be stressful, it’s possible to have awareness of your emotions during the process so you can embrace them.

Read more: More than One Third of people cry while selling their House

1.Make an effort not to grow emotionally connected with your House

 Trying not to fall in love with your new house is perhaps the most challenging aspect of purchasing and selling.

Surprisingly, this simply adds to your tension since you are scared and concerned about the “what if” it does not happen. 

Consider the process as “what is meant to be will be,” and adhere to the procedures and recommendations of specialists.

Proceed with care with the understanding that it may not happen; nevertheless, if everything falls into place, that is fantastic.

I know it’s easier said than done, but the excitement and enthusiasm of discovering your new house will only enhance your sentiment and any emotional feelings towards something that isn’t yours, leaving you feeling frustrated and disappointed if everything doesn’t fall into place.

7.Consider your home as a product

We understand that your home is filled with memories that you’ve created over the years, which makes it difficult to let go.

If you can, think of the house as a way to make some extra money, and keep in mind that it isn’t perfect.

Put yourself in the buyer’s shoes and try to see your home through their eyes, with all of its flaws.

And if there are any simple improvements you can make to increase the value of your home or make it more appealing to others, keep yourself busy with those.

8.Say a formal farewell:

My partner I and thinking of sharing our favourite memories we had in the house as a family.

We will then  bless and release the home to the new owners, wishing them all of the good times and wonderful memories we had.

A home is far more than a morter and a brick.

At the conclusion of a hectic day it’s your refuge, the place where children may be raised and the people they love. 

It is so natural that it might be an emotional experience to leave yourself behind.

“Although you move for positive reasons, relocating is a big grieving event — a better job, a better home, better schools,” stated life changing expert Russell Friedman.

It’s not easy to say goodbye, but these methods can close you down before you go.

9. PARTICIPATE IN A HOUSE COOLING PARTY

House cooling parties are the current fad. We’ve all heard of housewarming parties.

This celebration takes place before to the relocation and is a fantastic opportunity to say farewell to your former house. 

Everyone who has a personal connection to your home, including your close family and long-term friends, should be there.

Remember to invite well-known neighbours and other local acquaintances, as you may lose contact with them if you move away.

Encourage everyone to share their favourite recollections from the house. Following that, you might raise a glass to your former home and wish its new owners all the enjoyment you’ve had there.

A house cooling party is not only a time to share memories about your home, but it is also an opportunity to have one final dinner together in your home with your friends and family.

This lunch does not have to be extravagant. 

Preparing a three-course meal is likely to add stress to an already stressful situation.

Consider asking your guests to contribute a dish, buying pizzas, hiring caterers, or hosting a barbeque instead.

10.SEND A LETTER TO THE NEW OWNERS

“The strength of writing depends on its ability to provide closure,” stated American professor William J Farrell. 

As a result, writing a letter to the new owners of your house may be a meaningful way to say goodbye and prepare for the next chapter of your life.

This isn’t supposed to be a long letter.

Your new owners will want to create their own memories in your home, therefore they will not be interested in your life narrative. 

Simple remarks such as “I’ve loved raising a family in my house” and “I hope they enjoy living there as much as I have” would work.

This writing exercise will remind you that even if you are not present to appreciate your home, someone else will.

That notion may be a great consolation to those who are bidding their final goodbyes to a beloved house.

It’s not easy to say goodbye to your home, but these strategies will help you do so before you move.

11.Take anything with you as you go.

The only things you can take with you if you leave are not the pictures of your previous house.

Look around and you are going to see many of possible candlesticks.

If you have a green thumb, it’s a fantastic idea to transplant a favourite flower or little bust in your new house.

 Maybe you have always looked at your bedroom with its light or the kitchen with its drawer handles. 

You may remove these goods and substitute them with the new ones, to which you are less connected, without being a renter.

Take something with you: Uncover a plant or tree to replant at your new location, remove a brick from the front pathway, unscrew a doorknob – go ahead and cause some havoc.

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12.Concentrate on What Is Coming.

Change is the only constant in life, so try to stay focused on the future during the selling process. 

Begin thinking about that new job, or the new neighbourhood, or the new school for your children. Make every effort to think positively about the future. 

You will most likely miss your old home, but it is time to move on to bigger and better things and make new memories.

You’re likely to become as attached to your new home as you were to your old one.

13.Take a Photo shoot & Leave a Mark

Take Photographs:

Take a few photographs to help you recall your previous home.

Be sure to envision all of the parts of your home that provide you pleasure, such as your bedroom and the spot on your patio where you like to read the most.

You can also want to broaden the scope of the project by photographing distinctive locations in your neighbourhood, such as the playground your kids like to go to the most or the elementary school you attended in the past.

Remember to print out your photos and store them in a photo album specifically for your pictures as they deserve a life beyond the confines of your camera.

Include pictures so that you will be able to remember the primary reasons for taking the shots along the trail over a period of many decades.

When you are feeling sentimental, flipping through them will provide you with a genuine sense of pleasure.

You might also practise saying goodbye by taking images of the people and places you’ll be leaving behind before you travel.

Spending time doing activities that are significant to you is a great way to make the most of the time you have at home. “…spending some quality time in each area and allowing the memories to flood back. 

Also, lay your hands on the walls, doors, windows, or any other spots that stand out to you for as long as it seems natural to do so.

Make a proclamation about it: You could carve your initials into a tree, bury a time capsule in your garden, leave handprints in cement, or leave a message in a door jam. All of these are creative ways to leave a mark.

Make a Mark

There are a lot of people who feel bad about leaving their home because they hate the fact that their loved ones are thinking about it without them. 

Making your mark on your home may be one way to alleviate the discomfort associated with this experience.

There are several possible channels via which you may have an influence.

You could cut your beginning points into a tree, leave your handprints in wet cement, or leave a note in a discrete location such as a door jam or behind a shelf. Other options include carving your starting points into a tree.

If you will not be personally picking up your house, you may want to give some thought to the possibility of filling a time capsule with cherished memories of your family that can later be buried in the backyard of the new owners.

No matter what you decide, you will be able to leave a calm mark before you are sent, and you will feel more at ease if you keep in mind that there is still some of your belongings at the place where you previously lived.

    James Louw : Real Estate Expert and Advisor

    Freelance writer and editor James Louw has extensive experience in the real estate industry. He has worked as a residential real estate agent in the NYC area, and as a Buyers Agent for a commercial Real estate firm, and now he uses his knowledge to advise others.

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